How can stressed out couples unwind together? What are some ways busy parents in particular can relax with their partner? Since many parents are on the clock what are some things that they can do? Here are 4 quick ways to connect, even if kids are in the mix!
1. Walks!
Try short after dinner walks. Usually a sliver of time can be carved out between the end of dinner and advent of bedtime. Don your masks and take a 15 minute stroll. That won’t get you too far, especially when little legs are accompanying, but it gets you outside. In rural environments, you and the kids get to take in big nature and expand your horizons beyond the screens and the comparative stress of your 4 walls. In suburban/urban environments, nature may be in shorter supply (but perhaps all the more valued!), but it’s great to expand the perspective of your COVID bubble and safely interact with neighbors.
2. Group hugs!
Whenever my partner and I hug, our little one is on us like a self-guided missile, shouting, “group hug!” It’s totally adorable and makes us all feel good. Especially the other day when he said, “I could stay like this forever.” #heartmelt
3. Read!
If you have more time, or no kids, you might want to try sharing a book. Before my partner and I had children, one of us would cook and the other would read out load. We got through a bunch of books together that way and not only shared that time together, but then we also shared the world of the book. Long term couples may occasionally struggle to find novel things to talk about. Reading the same book goes a long way. This obviously can also be done if you are both cooking, on road trips, etc, with audio books.
4. Massage!
Nothing beats a mutual foot massages. Sit on opposite ends of the couch and put your legs on each other’s laps. During these cold weather months, you might want to massage over the wool socks, but its still a fun way to connect. Massage is a great way to be affectionate with non-sexual touch. Plus, if it’s harder to feel connected enough to be sexually intimate these days, this kind of physical affection is a great way to pave the way (though perhaps you should keep your ultimate ulterior motives to yourself ;)
5. Music!
You don’t have to be great singers, or musicians. You can even just listen to music together. In my pre-internet youth, my friends and partner would just chill together and listen to an entire album. It was great for unwinding, bonding and sharing a cultural experience. These days, one of us will play an instrument and the kids love to get out their various musical noise makers and we take turns making up songs. We also love pop-up dance parties :)